The scars never fade.

Angstig keek ze voor zich uit naar de jongen die tegen haar had gesproken. De jongen kwam haar vaag bekend voor, maar ze wist niet waarvan. Ze had een vermoeden maar die kon niet kloppen. Zijn gezicht was veranderd en in zijn ogen stond een verdrietige blik die vroeger zo speels was. Ze kon nog steeds geen woord uitbrengen en haalde daarom haar schouders maar op. De jongen wachtte niet meer op haar antwoord, pakte haar bij haar armen en stroopte haar mouwen omhoog. Hij schrok toen hij de littekens zag. Ze keek naar beneden en tranen gingen geluidloos over haar wangen heen. De jongen liet haar arm los en omhelsde haar. Zonder dat ze het merkte pakte hij het mesje uit haar jas. Ze duwde hem weg. Ze wilde niet dat hij het wist. Als haar vermoeden klopte, was deze jongen de reden van haar verdriet. Ze liep weg uit het park, weg van hem. Hij begon achter haar aan te lopen, haar naam te roepen. Zij bleef maar doorlopen, mensen ontwijkend. De voorbijgangers keken vreemd naar haar, heel haar make-up was uitgelopen door haar tranen. Hij liep harder en begon naast haar te lopen. Hij wilde het uitleggen maar zij kon het niet aanhoren. Hij had haar hart gebroken, had haar vernederd en haar vrienden van haar afgenomen. Ze zou nog liever sterven dan zijn excuses te accepteren. Hij greep haar bij haar linkerarm en stopte. De tranen liepen over zijn wangen. Hij bekende dingen die zij allang wist via haar vrienden en familie. Ze zuchtte, hoelang zou deze vertoning nog duren. Ze rukte haar arm los en begon te rennen. Het maakte haar niet uit waar ze heen rende, zolang het maar ver weg van hem was. Hij riep haar na maar zij reageerde niet. In de verte hoorde ze een bekend geluid. Ze besloot daar naar toe te gaan. Via diverse zijstraatjes bereikte ze haar doel. Ze ging liever dood dan dit nog langer te laten duren. De hefbomen gingen dicht en ze kon zien dat de trein er aan kwam. Ze schrok toen ze achter haar geluid hoorde. Hij riep haar naam weer. Ze besloot het op een eindsprint te wagen en rende naar de rails toe. Hij had het gezien en rende haar achterna. Hij stond mee op de rails toen de trein steeds dichterbij kwam. Zijn mond vormde een geluidloze ‘Het spijt me.’ en een traan liep over zijn wangen net voordat de trein de jongen en het meisje raakte.

Runaway.

I close my eyes and shout your name. You don’t seem to hear me, walking further unknowing. The road continues, step by step you tear my heart. Rain begins to fall, the wind grows stronger. One by one, my black colored tears fall down, to be washed away with the rain. Inch for inch you walk away from me, to be within a hour miles away from me. In a moment of panic, I still cry, a desperate scream makes you stop. One second you seem to doubt, a broken look is on your face. A moment I want to run to you, knowingly say that everything’s going to be allright, but I can’t. Slowly I lose my image of reality, forgetting the details of your face. I’ll be missing you, will you miss me too?

The Sacrifice

My breath is heavy. My hands are cold. My breath forms clouds hanging there, in the air. The tip of my nose is cold and turning blue. The wind plays a little game with my cheeks, I can’t feel them anymore. It’s getting hard to see the path and it’s getting worse with the minute. I can barely see five yards. The fog is surrounding me. Why are there just a few streetlights in the park? I hear bushes rustle, branches break. I see a silhouette, and another. I start to bike faster. Out of the corner of my eyes I can see two men. I hear them talking. And then I hear their pace speeding up behind me. I’m tired after my soccer training. We had conditioning. It’s too much. I can’t get away. One moment I’m on my bike, the other moment I’m on the ground. I feel a knee in my stomach. My hands try to reach it, but he’s hanging over me and holding me down. His entire weight is on me. I’m scared, I don’t want to be raped. The air in my lungs is being pushed out. I hear the person breathing. Then I collapse, everything’s gone. Everything gets pitch black.

My head is spinning and I feel arms dragging me over the wet and soft ground. Leafs are spread and form a pattern which I can’t see because of the darkness. Stumps of trees are everywhere and with every yard I feel them against my spine and legs. My head is beginning to function and I’m looking around. Now I can feel where arms are holding me, under my armpits. My eyes adapt to the dark and slowly I can see the lines what suppose to be branches. My arms are getting tired and I begin to move.

I shouldn’t have done that. My abductor notices my movements and stops. My breath stops and I try to look unconscious, but I fail. My movement has been seen. My abductor helps me up and begins to push in one particularly direction. I can see light, a slight limp of light that’s falling through the trees. It’s not the moon, it can’t be. The moon gives a different light. A more soft and gentle light, this light is harsh and getting me goosebumps. Then I hear a scream, the scream is that high and sharp that it only could be a girl's scream. As in a reaction I turn around and scream, ‘help!’ But it doesn’t matter. My mouth gets covered and I have to walk further on.

I just knew that the light I saw wasn’t soft and gentle. The light is coming from a little fire. Although it’s little it gives a huge amount of light. The fire is settled at the side of pilled wood that’s set above me. Fire should give people a save feeling, but somehow I want to run away from it, into the darkness of the trees.

I don’t have the knowledge of time. Did it take half a hour or a hour to drag me here? We’re now just a few feet from the fire and I can see the faces of our abductors and the girl clearly now. The glow spreads warmth and light. Enough to see that the girl who’s 10 feet from me got dark brown hair and that she’s the same as me. She looks frightened, logical she’s probably raped and don’t know what will happen. Her mascara is on all her face I see her lips vibrate. She’s even more scared then I am.

Her abductor looks like a normal man who you could see walking his dog in the park. He got light brown stubbles, I guess he’s in his thirties.

I couldn’t see my abductor because I was facing the fire. If I would turn around, I would be able to see him. But I’m not going to do that. Just because he will think I’m going to run away. And I’m scared that he’s going to shoot or wound me in a different way. Her abductor nods in my direction, probably a signal to my abductor. Suddenly the girl gets pushed and falls on the ground. He kicks her in her stomach and spine, I see that she can’t handle it anymore. That she’s tired, she doesn’t have enough power to face him, spit in his face and run away. Then suddenly out of nowhere he picks her up and throws her on the pile of wood. Quickly he puts his hands in the fire, takes the branches out of it and throws it to the girl. Like she’s supposed to catch it. But she doesn’t, instead she collapses. To my astonishment the man does this over and over again, I can’t see any burns on his hands.

The fire is now going where the girl is, it’s still small and it’s trying to get bigger but it just won’t. I feel hands in my back, I guess it’s my turn now. When he lifts me up I can feel the velvet of his cape. Then I fly for a short moment and unfortunately I fall in the fire. Everything is hurting now, my arms, my legs, every single part of my body. While I try to find a space where there is no fire, I hear the men mumble. It’s a spell or a ritual. It’s dark, evil. I can feel it, smell it and see it. The way they walk betrays there up to do evil. I know it because I’m a witch to. Not an evil one, but a good one. Not many people know this. I’m a witch.

The mumbling continues, it’s getting harder and louder with more rhythm while they walk in circles. It’s frightened how one simple thing can do so much harm. I look at the body of the girl, her skin is starting to burn away. The flames are licking my shoes, I smell the scent of burned human flesh. Everything is spinning, the fire is expanding and I have to take a risk. The girl is already dead, I can’t do anything for her. The two men are that concentrated that they won’t notices me flee. I take the risk and jump, land perfectly on my two feet and blindly I run away. Running to the safety of the darkness and hoping that they’ll think I’m burned in the fire just like the girl.

Through the woods is the only way out. I have to go to my bike. Everywhere I hear sounds, every little movement is a fright for me. Are they coming to get me?

I don’t know how long it took me to get back to my bike. But I know I have to get away. To a couple of houses maybe.

Finally! I can see a house, a safe harbor. There is still light. I ring the door. Please, let there be somebody I pray with my fingers crossed.

Slowly and hesitated the door opens. A woman with long dark hair stares to me with big red eyes. It’s creepy to see her, i can see the veins in her eyes. It’s like they’re going to burst.

‘What do you want?’ she finally asks. ‘I, I, I ….,’ because of her appearance I begin to sweat and stutter. This is not good. ‘Are you lost?’ she asks now and tries to give her voice a gentle tone. Only a wart is missing, that’s the only thing what I can see and make clear she didn’t stepped out of a fairytale. She’s probably around the mid thirty, but she looks way older. ‘Yes, yes… ‘, I say without knowing it’s me saying I’m lost. I know every damn corner here, it’s just too dark now.

‘Come in’, she simply says. I walk in, the hall is big and old-fashioned. She’s probably an antique geek or something in that direction. When I walk into the living room something creeps me out. I don’t know what it is, but the feeling is evil. I stick my nose in the air and carefully I sniff the scent of strange unfamiliar herbs from the kitchen. ‘I’m making herbal tea’, she says when she sees me sniffing, ‘do you want some to?’

I feel myself nod, why do I nod? I don’t want the god damn tea! I want to ring the police or my parents!

‘Sit down’, she says without any patience and pushes me down in a chair. Quickly I look around and notice voodoo dolls in the corner. Everything begins to spin and I can feel the flames licking my legs again. ‘Here, some tea’, she invites me, ‘ come and have some tea…

The world around me begins to tumble. My brains says I’m in real shit now. Then… out of nowhere I hear the same mumbling voices, mumbling words I can’t place. Words I slightly recognize but never use. I don’t know their meaning, I don’t know their power, the only thing I know is that I’m in danger. I can feel the presence of people around me. Somehow I can’t open my eyes.

Again and again, over and over I hear the same question. ‘Do you want some tea?’ Then I can’t hear anything. The silence takes place and fills the spaces in me.